Dear Family,
It’s that time again (already!) for my tri-annual personal update. As you could probably tell, I’ve been busy, which explains the absence of the other two updates this year. You know how time flies, ‘hare today, gone tomorrow’ if you’re a rabbit, who can also fly. I’ve spent the past year traveling around the world focusing mainly on the central west coast of America (northern). You should really try to get out there sometime, the culture is mostly centered around cats and cell phones, and they eat this delightful bean and cheese dish served on a flour napkin. 2009 has been quite the exciting year, with winning the lottery, getting my airplane license, publishing my first book and making up lies about myself. Hold on, phone’s ringing! Ok, I’m back. I did spend a lot of my time eating corn dogs, one day. Also, I’m getting really good at drawing noodles, mostly uncooked spaghetti with the help of a ruler. I’ve been working on a perfume that smells like a Laundromat, I think the secret is to just wash your clothes, though.
In case you haven’t talked to each other, I guess I’ll update you on my family. My mom is doing well, she works a lot and seems to shower everyday and I think she might be a drug dealer. My brother, Kevin, has had quite the busy year with joining the circus as a trapeze artist and actually not doing that at all. I think he lives in the Alamo.
I’ll tell Jake you send “your best”, which is probably just you on the couch, in a robe, watching MTV reruns, but hey, he’s a cat so he won’t judge too much. I’ve been meaning to mention something about pineapples.
Hope your year was just as exciting!
Love,
Bailey
P.S. The snowman is a metaphor.
Probably my favorite post mentioning corn dogs.
